Not all butterflies in your tummy mean a good sign. At some point, we all tend to experience this uneasy or tense feeling when we are worried or fearful. For instance, you could be scared and nervous about taking an exam, a medical test, or a job interview.
Sometimes we can get anxious when meeting people too. Being anxious can be a normal thing but for some people, they find it difficult to control it because they’re just anxious about almost everything!
Here are some symptoms of anxiety:
- Nervous, restless, or tensed
- Sweating
- Increased heart rate
- Breathing rapidly (hyperventilating)
- Feeling weak or tired
- Experiencing gastrointestinal (GI) problems
- Trouble concentrating or thinking
But did you know that you can turn that weakness into a strength? Tom Hardy, in full Edward Thomas Hardy, is a British actor who was known for his striking good looks, idiosyncratic personality, and cerebral performances in both cult films and mainstream blockbusters. Tom faced social anxiety while he was growing up and despite that, he somehow transformed himself into a full confident figure. If you would like the same confidence, follow Tom’s 4 simple rules on how you can turn your anxiety into confidence in any situation.
1. Be willing to polarize
The first step Tom takes in the process to be confident is by not making everyone like him. Tom accepted the fact that eventually, some people will not like him. During an interview question about ‘what kind of snack he would be’, Tom said he would be a bag of twiglet. The way he explained it is so strong. Whether someone likes him or not, he is who he is and nothing would change that. Rather than having no impression, this mindset gives someone a strong impression of you.
2. Allow yourself to have authentic reactions
Every time we meet someone new, we always hope that they would like us. But with Tom’s method, it’s the total opposite which to see if he likes that person! Be genuine and react to others depending on their actions. Often it is easy to do this among our friends but when it comes to impressing someone, they lose that authenticity. Signs of these are like laughing awkwardly at bad jokes, pretending that a boring conversation is interesting, and smiling even when they are insulted. To get around this, stop that thought of whether people like you but make it into if you like them. This will boost your confidence instead of making it feel like a try an error thing.
3. Stop trying to look flawless
Like it or not, every one of us has flaws because we are after all human! During an interview, Tom openly admits that he’s soft and sacred, which most people would hesitate to admit. Tom’s fear hasn’t completely dissolved but he’s learning confidence while experiencing fear. Admitting your flaws shows that you’re being very honest and straightforward. By doing so you have two benefits: people will sense that you are being original and not faking into somebody you are not and two, by sharing your flaws, you will slowly build confidence in yourself. You eventually avoid the shadow rule which is hiding parts of yourself for being more acceptable to people.
4. Prioritize your own comfort
When you feel comfortable, I tell you, your confidence level will just kick it. Some people try to blend in by doing what others do. This, however, makes you feel more nervous because you would keep asking yourself if you’re doing it right. By prioritizing your own comfort, it shows that you are not focused on other people’s approval
Apart from Tom’s method of dealing with anxiety, here are some other ways you can treat anxiety:
- Meditation
- Staying active and exercising
- Eating healthy
- Getting enough sleep
- Journaling
- Practice breathing
- Avoid unhealthy habits like alcohol or smoking
It is absolutely okay to feel a little anxious. Sometimes that anxious feeling turns out to be something good. But bear in mind too much of it can affect your lifestyle and eventually your health. Anxiety is not a weakness. With it, you can turn it into the platform of your confidence, just like how Tom Hardy did!
Sources: Charisma On Demand, Mayo Clinic, Healthline